Congratulations on the Birth of Your New Baby! Condolences on the Tragic Loss of Your Sense of Humor!
Job Description for the Dumbest Job Ever
Answers to “Is Your Dog Friendly?” Applied to Me
Not-to-Be-Missed Shouts of 2018
I've Decided to Parent the Way Jack Dorsey Runs Twitter
I Am The One Woman Who Has It All
Not-to-Be-Missed Shouts of 2017
Feminist Knock-Knock Jokes
How to Be the Best Mom
Behold, I Am a New Parent
Fast Times at Alabama High
List: Things People Say When You Get Divorced That They Really Should Say When You Get Engaged
List: Radiohead or Mueller Report?
DON’T CALL IT A COMEBACK: Animated Features Forthcoming From John Lasseter’s New Studio
Super Bowl Commercial Bingo
DON’T CALL IT A COMEBACK: Kevin Spacey’s “Let Me Be Limericks”
DON’T CALL IT A COMEBACK: Seinfeld, Ep. 181 “The Grovel”
Common Sayings Updated for American Culture
Honest Greeting Cards You Should Expect From the Women In Your Life This Week
DON’T CALL IT A COMEBACK: Excerpted Testimony from the Supreme Court Nomination Hearing for Steff McKee, Formerly of Pretty In Pink
If Goodreads Users Reviewed Your Life the Way They Reviewed Your Book
Our Reviews of Men or Real Amazon Reviews of Jar Openers? (cowritten with Theresa Masse)
End Times Knock-Knock Jokes
Other Things You Should Let Sink In
Motherhood: An FAQ
A Generic First Day of Spring/Summer/Autumn/Winter Conversation
I'm Your Freelance Check and I'm Here to Change Your Life
List: Message on a Heart-Shaped Candy or DM That Gets You Blocked 4-Ever?
List: Netflix and Chill for Married People
List: Other News Stories I Expect the Media to Break This Year
Get Pumped for Our 110% Sexual Harassment-Free Holiday Office Party!
I’m Asking for Privacy While I Seek Treatment for Being a Piece of Human Garbage
Just What I Wanted, a Whole 24 Hours of Recognition Once a Year
List: Other Books Ivanka Trump Should Consider Writing
The Resistance Will Be Brought to You By Pepsi
A Guide for Brands That Have Recently Discovered Women
List: “If Mama Ain’t Happy Ain’t Nobody Happy”: Revised and Expanded
I’m Looking for a Candidate Who Tells It Like It Is
Are You Sure There Isn’t Something Else I Can Do Before the End of the School Year?
List: Your Cute Wedding Hashtags Twenty Years Later
Please Don’t Get Murdered at School Today
The Old Farmer’s Almanac Predicts “We’re All Fucked” This Winter
Is There a Parenting Expert On This Plane?
List: Radiohead Song or Accurate Description of My Parenting?
List: I Know You Are But What Am I: Political Edition
Welcome to Our Design Studio, Where You’ll Never See the Light of Day But You Can Bring Your Dog
Quiz: Is this my first book tour or my own funeral?
What I thought I’d be doing at age 50, according to my childhood self
Erotic Valentine’s Day Gifts for Moms
Updated Definitions of Insanity
An Honest Back-to-School Letter From Your Child's New Teacher
I've Edited a Website for 12 Months so I'm Pretty Sure I Know What It's Like to Have a 1-year-old
Nursery Rhymes I Now Sing to My Kids Thanks to This Stupid Election
Things I'll Be Saying on Thanksgiving Instead of Grace
How to Talk to Your Kids About Gay Marriage
You Might Be a Creative, But You Don't Own Creativity
Road Tripping With Teenagers: A Survival Guide
You Never Think You’ll Turn Fifty
We heard you. And decided to do something else instead.
MasterClass: I Teach Pettiness
Words That Make You Sound Drunk and There is Definitely No Hidden Message Here
Please Unfriend Me
When Will It Be Time's Up for Motherhood and Marriage?
Things I Did When I Was Supposed to be Writing My Book
Oh my God, Sports Illustrated. Just Stop.
A Day on the Internet in 2017: An Internal Transcript
Hey America, do accidents happen anymore? Especially when a kid is involved?
How to Talk to Your Kids About Bernie Sanders
A Conversation with Chris Monks, Managing Editor of McSweeney's Internet Tendency: Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3